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Monthly Archives: August 2016

Easy Ways to Avoid Friend Zone

friend-zoneThere are a variety of ways that you can draw in and date ladies. You can abstain from getting into the friend zone by concentrating on an assortment of various components in general. On the off chance that you will likely figure out how to keep away from the friend zone, then you should concentrate on a few straightforward tips that work. The accompanying will help you pick up the high ground in any circumstance. In the event that you are going to really motivate ladies to abandon you outside of the friend zone, then here you go, the best thing that you can do to get pushing ahead when you’re figuring out how to maintain a strategic distance from the friend zone.

# Ask Her Out (Just Do It)

After you have been friends for a short span, the next thing is simple, ask her out. That’s right, you need to ask her out. Making sure that ask her out will clearly define what you want, and what women will want overall. You will not be able to go forward without this. You need to make sure that you ask her out and make sure to say that it’d be a date, not just as friends.

# Do Not Act Like Her Other Friends

You need to be able to be her friend, but not in the same way that other friends are. You need to separate the relationship that you have in a certain manner. Talk to her about her dreams, where she wants to go, where she wants to visit, and things along those lines. Now, when you’re discussing things with her, drop hints about going to places together, and perhaps explore being more than friends. Sometimes, just dropping hints will get her thinking, and eventually will help you gain the goal of existing the friend zone. You cannot learn how to avoid the friend zone, if you act like her other friends.

# Touch Her In Subtle Ways

Give her attention as more than a friend. Reach for her hand when things are a bit dangerous, open doors for her, and be affectionate lightly. You want to make sure that she feels your touch, when it feels natural. The best way to do this, is to make sure that you are attentive to being a gentleman at all times. You don’t want to overdo this, or even overthink it. If you overthink this, you’ll seem desperate and you’ll go the wrong way. Touch her as a gentleman, looking to help her with simple things, and she’ll pick up on it as you commence learning how to avoid the friend zone.

 

Tips to Dating for Shy Women

Introduction standing out one’s hand and looking at someone else without flinching—can startle for the modest lady. The cerebrum locks up as you scramble to consider something significant to say. You go into disrepair when you’re approached what you accomplish as a profession. You stammer. The warmth ascends in your face and under your arms. You’re all of a sudden unequipped for framing a linguistic sentence. You contemplate internally, “Why might anybody think about me? I’m truly not that fascinating!”

Fear not. Many shy people have succeeded in meeting new people and forming lasting, happy relationships. With a little practice, you can too. Here are some tips for taming your social terror.

# Breathe. Whenever you feel your heart racing, breathe deeply and slowly. If you really start to feel uncomfortable (your face has become so hot you could use it for a wok), excuse yourself and go to the restroom.

# Smile. People respond well to people who smile. No need to grin like an idiot, but a disarming smile will get ‘em every time. Smiling conveys friendliness and approachability. Show teeth whenever possible. Avoid looking like a figure at a wax museum by practicing in a mirror before you leave the house.

#  Listen to what the other person is saying! This is important. Instead of fretting about what you’ll say next, still your mind and listen. If a man tells you about his weekend on the golf course, and you know absolutely nothing about golf, just ask him what he likes about it, how he got into it, etc.

# Compliment the other person. Sincerity is key, so find something you like and mention it. You may be freaked out by the idea of complimenting a man on his soulful eyes, so mention his watch, suit, tie, or even his shoes. No need to go overboard: “Nice shoes,” will do it.

# Prepare a pitch. The question, “So, Sally, what do you do for a living?” is bound to come up, so have a ready answer. No need to brag about capturing the company Tidy Break room Award; just state clearly what you do for a living and don’t apologize for it.

# Ask questions. People love to talk about themselves (okay, except for people like you), so ask questions. Come up with a list before you leave the house, i.e., How did you get into that line of work? Where did you go to school? Have you seen the new Brad Pitt movie? And so on.

# When you fumble, turn the subject to the other person. Whenever you find yourself longing to throw a blanket over your head and crawl off, try saying something like, “And what about you?”

# Stay on top of current events. You don’t necessarily want to bring up your stand on Bush v. Kerry during a first meeting, but be able to discuss less controversial issues intelligently.

# Remember the weather! Some people have the “gift of gab,” the ability to make strangers feel like they’ve known them forever. They are fearless about talking about the weather, gas prices, whatever. Shy people worry that talking about mundane things will make them appear stupid. But seemingly dull subjects like the weather affect everybody. People relate to them.

# Hold your head up. It’s the simplest, most effective way to look confident. Good posture, coupled with that fabulous smile of yours, gives you a “winner’s vibe.” You’re guaranteed to be a hit!

Be warned: These tips will not help you if you don’t leave the house. It’s just too easy to watch the Friends finale for the umpteenth time instead of meeting people, but I promise you that Prince Charming is never going to climb through your bedroom window.

Talking to strangers can be uncomfortable, but with practice it will surely get easier. If you have a bad night, congratulate yourself for making the effort. When you have a good night, understand that you earned it. Know that countless wonderful nights are on their way to you.

About Jealousy

Jealousy  is a confused theme with a considerable measure of moving parts – it is an interpersonal circumstance that includes the desirous individual, his or her social accomplice, and a conceivably undermining rival. Specialists concur that envy likewise includes three, related segments: (1) feelings, including outrage, trouble, apprehension, and uneasiness, (2) contemplations, for example, suspicions or stresses over the circumstance, and (3) practices, which include any way that the desire is “carried on,” including conveying it to your accomplice or to the rival.1

It is clear from your question that you are experiencing all three of these components. As an interpersonal communication researcher, I focus on the behavioral aspect of jealousy and I believe that it is the most important component – relationships and other individuals are, after all, only affected by your jealousy once you let them know that you are jealous. You have clearly expressed your jealousy to your partner because you mention that he doesn’t think you should be jealous. What you didn’t note – and what is potentially very important – is how you communicated your jealousy. Did you explain your feelings calmly? Did you yell and scream or throw things? Did you become very quiet and deny feeling jealous? There are many different ways to express jealousy and research consistently finds that the most effective way to do it is integratively, that is, by being direct, but expressing yourself calmly and constructively explaining how you feel and what you are thinking. In fact, the more romantic partners use integrative communication to express their jealousy, the more satisfied and committed they are in their relationships.2

Another way to think about your jealousy situation is by considering how your partner is responding to your jealousy. His reaction will depend on how you communicate that jealousy to him, and again, the integrative expression of jealousy is recommended. Research has determined that, when jealous individuals use positive, direct jealousy messages, their partners are less likely to be uncertain about the jealous individuals’ behavior.Their partners are also more likely to experience positive emotions and respond with similar, positive messages, including trying to come to an understanding about the jealousy situation.4

Jealousy should not be belittled – you are experiencing it; right or wrong, perceived or accurate, it does need to be managed in some way. And you are not alone – a 2008 survey of members of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy found that romantic jealousy was a major problem for one-third of their therapy clients, which suggests jealousy can have significant effects on romantic relationships.5 My recommendation is to continue to monitor the situation, communicate your jealousy to your partner in a positive, integrative manner, and take his perspective into account. A little humor might help too (e.g., joking to your partner and friend that she is his “other wife” might diffuse the situation a bit). Good luck!

1Pfeiffer, S. M., & Wong, P. T. P. (1989). Multidimensional jealousy. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 6, 181-196.

2Bevan, J. L. (2008). Experiencing and communicating romantic jealousy: Questioning the investment model.Southern Communication Journal, 73, 42-67.

3Bevan, J. L., & Tidgewell, K. D. (2009). Relational uncertainty as a consequence of partner jealousy expression.Communication Studies, 60, 305-323.

4Yoshimura, S. M. (2004). Emotional and behavioral responses to romantic jealousy expressions. Communication Reports, 17, 85-101.

5White, G. L. (2008). Romantic jealousy: Therapists’ perceptions of causes, consequences, and treatments. Journal of Couple and Relationship Therapy, 7, 210-229.